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Change is inevitable. Whether it be welcomed or feared, we are all faced with transitions that shape us into who we are. With any luck, we are shaped gently, carefully molded into exactly who we want to be….. caution given to what we stand for. Occasionally change happens quickly and recklessly, leaving us confused, rattled, and picking up the pieces of a life we thought would never break.
Change often means choices. Decisions we make for ourselves when we decide to either go out on a limb or choose to play it safe. Most times, we have no prediction of how change will effect us until it has already taken place. It is then that we “take stock” and deem a choice either the right or the wrong one. Even the best of intentions can occasionally lead us down the wrong path.
One of the most difficult things about change, is coming to terms with choices that are made for you. Whether by a higher power or someone who plays a key role in your life. I’m talking about the life-changing, heart-breaking, shocking, knock the wind out of your sails changes. Whether it be the loss of a job, financial circumstances, an accident, or almost anything seemingly negative that was unexpected. Those things are hard to cope with. The how’s and why’s and the “what if’s” consume us if we let them. They move into our brains and they take over our thoughts, usually with zero regard to vacancy.
Matters of the heart, tricky to begin with, are complicated even further when faced with choice and change. “Change of heart”. We’ve all heard the phrase used. “Oh, so-and-so had a change of heart”. In so-and-so’s case, what was more than likely a positive change has left someone else realing in shock that a certainty in their life is no longer concrete. Questions often left unanswered and goodbyes never said.
The loss of a loved one, changes us. Break-ups change us, leaving us with a new knowledge of what not to repeat, and hopefully a few memories to hold in our hearts. The death of a loved one is not only a change, but one that carries a permanence rarely felt otherwise. The thoughts and memories we’re left with may never seem enough and the barren void may seem permanent. More often than not, it is. It then becomes a matter of whether you allow that void to consume your entire heart, or whether you choose to treat that void as a looking pond, safe and sacred, surrounded by beauty as new life experiences plant around it.
As humans, however cautious we may be, it is our nature to eventually put trust in other people. Burned as our pasts have left us, our character nearly always heals just enough to try again. Each time we trust, it is with less reliance and more reservation. While the scars of past failures may no longer be painful to the touch, the tissue runs deeper each time. On the surface we are hardened. Numb. Only those who make it beyond the scar tissue really know the true depth of our feelings. The strength of our character and the vastness of our courage are woven into those layers, slowly becoming more apparent to the ones we let in.
We are forced to trust daily and on many different levels. Trust is not always neccesarily a matter of the heart.
To an extent we trust our bosses. If not a full blown trust, at the very least it is a hope. We hope that they have our backs. We hope that they are fair, reasonable, and level-headed.
There is trust put in our doctors, our childrens teachers, our butchers and in our farmers. Though skeptical, most of us trust our banking institutions. There is a blind trust that if we needed them, the Fire Department would come.
A change to any one of these situations, whether a choice of our own, or through someone else’s circumstance, has the power to change life as we know it, for better or worse.
While change has the power to be life altering, it is the lessons that we carry from our circumstances, the lessons we’re taught through our choices right and wrong, that shape our lives. While a pendulum, much like our lives, occasionally becomes displaced, it always returns to equilibium and that is where we find our “new normal”. Our new constant, and our fresh start.
Difficult as it may be, change is rarely insurmountable, and is neccesary for growth. Perhaps the most we can do is be as cautious of others changes as we are of our own. Offer understanding, acceptance, and a reassurance that no one particular transition is the end. One of the beauties of life is that we can almost always change our minds, and that it is never too late to re-mold ourselves.
Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.
Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.
Image may be NSFW.Clik here to view.
