Well friends, clearly Wednesday came and went and I never did get around to my usual link-up with Shannon @ Life After I Dew for ‘So What! Wednesday!’
This week I sure as heck have a lot to say ‘so what!’ to, but I’m not sure how much of it is actually appropriate! Hi, Mom! 
Here goes the G-rated version! Hope you brought popcorn. This week I’m saying so what if:
I almost got arrested in Old Navy. Okay, okay….. maybe ARRESTED isn’t the word. I’d bet they were close to asking me to leave though! I’d also be willing to bet my picture is now on a poster in their break room. Apparently “Being a b*tch is FROWNED UPON in this ESTABLISHMENT!” Funny that “being a dumba$$” isn’t! Oh NOOOOOOOO. Being a dumbass is REQUIRED. I “may” have even threatened to call the Po-Po for a $66.00 transaction that hit my bank account. The manager with one eye that crossed over told me: “I’m sorry but that will take 24-48 hours to credit your account”. THEIR screw up and now I have to wait for 2 days! Yeah, THAT’LL happen!
PS: I only noticed she was cross-eyed while I was yelling at her. In her face. Geez, come to think of it, maybe she was stroking out! Kidding! (disclaimer: I have NOTHING against cross-eyed people in general, so before some squirrel-loving Holley resident jumps on here to tear me a new bunghole, let me make that clear! I think you have great eyes BillyBob!)
Long story short: Old Navy: 1 Aud: 0
There goes tonights bar money! 
So WHAT that I then left the store formerly known as Old Navy, got myself a cold pop, simmered down and proceeded to call friends and mess with them, pretending that I really HAD been detained and needed them to come get me!! Best laughs I’ve hand in ages! I ALMOST pranked my Dad, but thought better of it. It’s way too close to April Fool’s Day to tip my hand on any pranking with HIM!
So WHAT that I almost gave my Dad a heart attack one year when I called him on April Fool’s Day and told him I was pregnant with bambino numero tres. I was recently separated from my husband and eating Ramen noodles as a food group. Wait, they’re not? You can see why he would be so mortified! I definitely got an Emmy in my own mind for that one, as I was wickedly convincing! Hey Dad….. about that third baby. Fall babies are fantastic, aren’t they? For realzzzz! Nah, even I can’t pull that one off!!
So what that since airing my Old Navy story I’ve been called ‘June’. As in Honey Boo-Boo’s Mom. Certainly I wasn’t THAT bad. Nor do I suffer from ‘forklift foot’. I do make a mean ‘sketti’ though!
So what that I watched the first two seasons of ‘Downton Abbey’ in a matter of days! On my laptop, in my bed, all night long until I was caught up. And yes, smart-alecs, that is the ONLY thing that happens all night long in my bed! Not even sleep does anymore! Like most things in life, I was a little slow on the Downton Abbey draw, but I’m full speed ahead now. What a great show! Who ever would have thought that I would put in PRINT that I enjoy ‘Masterpiece Theater’?? This just in: I’m old.
So what if I’m LEGITIMATELY planning on wearing my pajama pants to a bar tonight! Who doesn’t want to be comfy when they have a few beers? It’s either that or wear jeans and unbutton them half-way into the evening to make room for yummy, greasy bar food. I say skip the middle man. Straight to pajama pants. Also, sometimes I’m such a snazzy dresser that other girls envy me, so I occasionally wear my pajamas just to give them a fair shot. TOTALLY KIDDING. Well, about the last part. Not about the pajama pants.
So what if I bought toy mice for my cats today and my dog took them and hid them all in the couch? Do not pass go, do not collect $200, directly to the depths of the couch. There’s $5.00 down the drain. Well, the couch. I thought Chihuahua’s were supposed to like Taco Bell? Not mice! The commercial CLEARLY states: “Yo quiero Taco Bell!”
So what that it’s ‘supposed’ to snow tomorrow? First of all, we’re in Western New York. It’s WINTER. While the rest of the country uses the universal phrase ‘$hit happens’, we might as well coin ‘snow happens’. How often do we really ever get what they predict anyway!?!
If it DOES snow, stay safe my friends! Might as well head on down to your local Wegmans with all the other jack-wagons and write Danny a check! Don’t forget toilet paper! It would be REALLY $hitty to be stuck home without TP! Pun intended. Obbbbviously!
